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Love or In Love? Part 1 – The Difference

PiningHave you ever heard someone whining about how much he loves a girl? Or vice versa?


I have.




When I observe people in this and many other situations, I’m convinced that most people don’t know the difference between really loving someone, and only being in love with someone.


It’s been a while since I wrote about relationships, and I’ve been wanting to write about this forever.


Here’s how I see it.

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Why It’s Great to be 40!

A La La La La LongMid-life crisis! Menopause! Aches and pains! Hit songs of your youth now oldies!


And…ooops, maybe the makings of a paunch.


These are just some of the frightening things people associate with being 40.


When I started the AA35 blog, I wrote why 35 is a big deal. It’s the age you realise you’re nearer 40 than 20, but when you see “40”, your mind actually thinks… “50”! That puts one in an ‘old’ frame of mind, with all the worries that entails!


Well guess what? I crossed 40 for a while back, kissing 50 territory… for real! And I want to give you some perspectives that might help you embrace this incredible milestone!

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How to Really Set Goals

SMART goalsHave you heard of SMART goals? Chances are most people have. In fact, I explained how to do this briefly in an earlier article. For the most part it’s a good start and I still take clients through it if they want to learn the system.


In recent years, however, I’ve moved away from the SMART goals system, or indeed many other strategies, and taught people a different approach.




Because in most cases, the way we set goals is plain ineffective.

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The Little Toes in Life

Short Take: Relationships, Life


This year I finally decided to go to the Jeju Salsa Festival, one of the best such festivals in the world. I  prepared for six months, taking lessons, going social dancing, generally upping my level to be compatible with some of these dancers. I was super excited.


Set for fly off on a Friday, here’s what happened the Tuesday before.

Little Toe Ecchymosis

Like an idiot, I stubbed my toe against a sofa, but this was no ordinary stub! The pain didn’t go away after a minute or two. After icing it I went to sleep for a couple of hours. When I awoke I couldn’t walk. I headed for the A&E where I was diagnosed with a bone contusion or a possible hairline fracture.


Looking at the ecchymosis on my little toe, I was struck by the ridiculous humour of the situation, and acutely reminded how the seemingly most insignificant things can derail the best laid plans of mice and men.

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